I have been trying to get more of my music notated. That would be the music I play myself, the pieces featured here on this website. The pieces I’ve written for others (notably Keith) are definitely notated; how else would I convey the music to them?!
But “my” pieces live in my heart and hands, and it turns out the real reason I don’t write them down is that I don’t know what’s in them. I can play them. I just don’t know what they are.*
It’s more than a little bit disconcerting to realize that I have no actual idea what the notes are when I’m performing. A feeling, a sound, a motion — that’s all I have. I believe that’s partly why I feel so free playing my music. (The other part being: it’s my music, I can play it any way I like!) On the other hand, on the rare occasion that I forget what I’m doing, I’m fairly sunk. Well, I improvise my way out of difficulty. That’s the primary rule of a performer: just keep playing! Still, it might help if I also had an intellectual concept of my music, in addition to the aural and kinesthetic concepts.
Anyway, I’m working on notating my pieces, and I don’t actually know what’s in them, and it’s driving me just a touch batty.
In case you ever wondered.
*one example of this: for the longest time I believed that Under the Greenwood Tree is in Gb; it’s not, it’s in Db. The first chord is a Gb chord, so I didn’t think about it beyond that. My judgmental mind says: I was a music major and extremely good at theory!!! I ought to know what key I’m playing in!!!! My music-making self says: hey, I play it right, stop bugging me!